Shorttakes

 

A somber note...

 

Dear stitching family ~

I've been a week pondering exactly how to write this note to everyone.  And I've realized there's no RIGHT way or even good way.

Last Friday, May 29th, Abby Middleton ~ my little sister ~ suffered a massive coronary & passed away Friday evening.  To say that my family ~ including my shop family ~ is in shock would be a massive understatement.  There was no warning.  Her boys, my nephews, were off playing football with buddies (for which I am grateful).  Jay was home & able to call 911 immediately (again, not by accident ~ one good thing about being still under "shelter in place"). 

 

For a week we have been trying to find our way forward, while mourning our incredible loss, but also celebrating her amazing life. 

 

Somewhere I heard the phrase that God puts us here on earth for a specific purpose & when He feels that we have done that perfectly wonderful thing, He lets us come home.  This would be a fantastic description of Abby. Except, what was that purpose?  There were so many things she did so well.

If you had the chance to meet her, you know that she is CHATTY!  She would literally talk to anyone!  This characteristic wasn't always a good thing ~ I did have to extricate us from a situation in Italy one time where she just started chatting away to these 2 random guys!  Um, Ab, no, just keep moving, JUST KEEP MOVING!  But 99% of the time it was wonderful.  And might I say, not a gift I have (she gets it from our mom).  She had STORIES.  Lord, did she have stories....  She could tell you about a 5 minute drive in to work & you would laugh until you cried!  Poor Jay, by the time I actually MET him, I knew so much more than anyone should ever know about their sister's new boyfriend!  I came to realize very quickly that Jay was the best thing to ever happen to Abby.  As many times as I tried to warn him, "Dude, you should really reconsider this" (because, ya know, older sister...), he just got better and better.  And he made Abby better and better.  And happier! 

She was creative ~ she would spend hours doodling (usually in class...).  Now, most of us doodle, right?  Very few of us doodle entire forest families of sweet pudgy animals (think, Boynton cards).  She knew how to stitch, but she didn't do much for a long time.  But when she did, she was the original electric fingers!  Good grief, it was ridiculous!  She then took the next logical step & began designing.  All these years later, we are still selling her designs!  But like a true artsy person, details weren't always her thing.  She would send me the finished piece (I was in Charlotte), a semi-graph (don't ask) & a big wad of floss (no tags).  "Here!  It's finished ~ ready for you to chart!".  Um. What fabric is this?  "Not really sure.  Just match it up to something".  Ooookay.  How about these threads ~ are they DMC?  Overdyed?  "Yep". Yep, what? "I think I used both". ARGH.....older sister frustration kicking in!

But by far the best thing she did was creating her family.  In true Abby fashion, she was sent to the hospital 5 weeks early to deliver Jimmy ~ she'd been having blood pressure issues & her doctor just said, "Time's up".  So she drove herself to the hospital, called me to bring her stuff (mind you, I had been HOUNDING her to get her "go bag" packed for a while at that point ~ I'm no doctor, but I watch them ALL on TV!).  Naturally, nothing was ready.  So she stomps in to the reception desk where there were, I'm sure, some lovely & kind volunteers, and she says, "Dr McBride sent me over here to have this baby.  I'd like my epidural NOW". I can only imagine....  They kindly told her that, maybe she should at least get upstairs to Labor & Delivery first.  So up she went.  Proceeds to tell the nurses there the same story.  Now keep in mind, she's not in labor.  Which the nurses pointed out.  She said, "I don't care.  My cousin Carolyn said ASK EARLY ASK OFTEN".  Again, I can only imagine.  Long story short, they checked her in, started her on drugs to induce her and.....nothing.  For 2 1/2 days....nothing.  In the meantime, Jay is having me ferry him clean clothes, his contact stuff, his razor....  Abby wants her quilt, her own pillows, her Gameboy, some magazines....  By the time her Dr was on duty & said that's it, we're doing a C-section, Ruthie & I needed one of those hotel carts to move all her crap out of the room!!  They looked like they'd been living there for weeks!!

Side note ~ Jimmy ended up having some trouble & was taken to the NICU where a very special nurse, whom we knew from our retreats, was on duty.  She asked to be switched from the baby she had been caring for to care for Jimmy.  3 days later, right before he was going to be released, Donna said, "I just want one more person to listen to his heart".  Turns out, she heard something "off".  Probably saved his life.  Without going into details, by virtue of being born early, parts of his heart hadn't fully developed (again, not a doctor ~ and they don't have these things on Chicago Med, or ER).  God put Donna in our lives first as a friend & then as a guardian angel.

   

As the boys grew up, Abby became the "pack" mom.  School friends, sports team friends...they all seemed to end up at the Midds house.  And she was phenomenal.  She provided them a safe space (they were allowed to cuss without recrimination ~ as long as it wasn't directed at someone else), but she also answered questions & let them know when they were out of line.  Whenever she had a group of them out to eat somewhere (which happened a lot during baseball travel season), all she did was point to the middle of the table ~ and all the cell phones were piled up & not touched until it was time to leave.  Several years, during Spring Break, she rented a van, packed up 8 or 10 or 12 boys, and took them to Hershey, or to Great Wolf Lodge, or somewhere else.  Just her & a vanload of 8th-9th-10th-11th graders.  Now, to me, that sounds like someone saying, "Ya know, you really don't need your appendix, not that there's anything wrong with it, but we're just gonna cut you open & take it out.  No, you don't need anesthesia ~ you'll hardly feel a thing!  Really."  But she LOVED every minute of it.  And that may be the one perfect thing she was here to do.  Those boys are now all 18 or 19.  And 8 of them will be the pallbearers for her.  She would love that.  She would also have some sassy comment about not letting one or the other be the "driver"!

 

There are so many more stories I could tell...

But I would just ask you, our stitching family, to keep us in your hearts & prayers.  We will move forward, minute by minute, but it will take time. 

 

 

From left to right: Ruthie, me (in the back), Carm (holding the sign), and Abby

 

Hugs, stitches & tears ~

Beth & all of us who love her so